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Today it’s Sunday and A is Roger Wilson, who goes with his family to church. After church, they head to Roger’s grandmother’s house for Sunday dinner. A reflects on religion, noting that “religions have much, much more in common than they like to admit. The beliefs are almost always the same” (77). S/he also reflects on Roger’s mother, a single mother, “who is so tired, so taxed. I feel as much belief in her as I do in God—I find faith in human perseverance, even as the universe throws challenge after challenge our way” (78). A feels this may be one of the reasons s/he is so drawn to Rhiannon, because of her similar desire to persevere.
It’s a three-hour drive to the grandmother’s house, and it is not until the end of the day when A finally gets a chance to use the computer. A emails Rhiannon, pretending he is Nathan. But when he checks his personal email, he finds a warning from the real Nathan Daldry. A is shocked to get this email from Nathan, who somehow knows that he lost possession of his body and that A took over: “I will not let you possess me or destroy my life. I will not remain quiet” (80). No one has ever known about the secret of A’s existence before, and it is hard to hide the fear on A’s face from Roger’s mother. A wishes that he could confide in the mother, “[b]ut I am not really her son, or anyone’s son” (81).
The next day, A gets a happy email reply from Rhiannon, saying how much fun she had dancing with him. But then A gets another ominous email from Nathan, saying he has gone to the police. A searches online for any news about Nathan Daldry. S/he is shocked when s/he finds articles showing that Nathan has been talking to the press, finding headlines like, “The Devil Made Him Do it: Local boy, pulled over by police, claims demonic possession” (84). Despite their fear, A also feels sorry for Nathan, who must have woken up on the side of the road, bewildered by his experience. Nathan explains it the only way he can think of: demonic possession.
As Margaret Weiss, A has to feign a cold to ward off her boyfriend’s Sam’s kisses. When s/he finally gets away from Sam, A is able to get to the library and check email. S/he discovers a new email from Rhiannon, who has found out that Steve does not have a cousin named Nathan. Rhiannon wants answers. Immediately, A writes back, asking if s/he can meet Rhiannon, to explain.
A gets another email from Rhiannon, who also wants to meet, and A confirms, “I’ll be there. Although not in a way you might expect” (90). A makes a plan to meet Rhiannon later that day, in the body of Megan Powell. As it gets closer to meeting time, A reflects that s/he has never shared the secret of their identity with anyone, and A wonders if it’s the right thing to do.
A meets Rhiannon at a book store, and of course, Rhiannon is stunned when A explains their entire situation. A tells Rhiannon, “I don’t want to keep meeting you as different people. I want to meet you as myself” (94). Rhiannon is disbelieving and then angry, thinking that Justin is playing an elaborate practical joke on her. But A gives evidence to prove her story by telling Rhiannon specific details of what they discussed when A was in the bodies of Nathan, Amy, and Justin. A tells Rhiannon that s/he wants to be open with Rhiannon about her situation: “I have lived my whole life like this, and you’re the thing that has made me wish it could stop” (94). A reveals to Rhiannon their name, which she has never told anyone (“A”). Rhiannon doesn’t reject A, but she also can’t completely accept A’s story. A suggests that they meet again the next day. Rhiannon is willing to do so.
A must deal with the consequences of his/her actions. Instead of spending their day doing what their host would have done, as s/he has tried to do for the past sixteen years, s/he instead chooses to spend their day doing what s/he wants to do, and what A wants to do is to build a connection with Rhiannon. S/he not only wants to see her again, but he wants her to see him: he wants to make his life visible to her.
Paralleling A’s connection to Rhiannon is a more ominous connection. When Nathan reaches out to A, demanding answers, A is shocked and doesn’t know how to respond. This plot twist creates a great deal of suspense as the reader wonders if Nathan will discover A’s true identity, just as Rhiannon did. After sixteen years of tight control over his/her identity, things are starting to get beyond his/her control.
In these chapters, A also reflects on his 98% philosophy—the idea that humans are 98% similar and only 2% different. Relying on the fact that people are basically similar has allowed A to survive. Although religions and languages and cultures may be different, in the end, people are people, and so A can step into the shoes of another and not be completely lost. When s/he looks at Roger’s mother and sees her strength, despite her exhaustion, A feels connected to her, moved by the human spirit’s universal determination to persevere.
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By David Levithan